For me, it was the classic stages of grief, but not necessarily in order and lots of bouncing around: anger (still cringe when I think of some of the things I said to the people who love me), denial, depression (got stuck in this one for a LONG time), bargaining and acceptance. I'm halfway between bargaining and acceptance right now.

But as to your question of taking care of "present me" ... I retired a few weeks ago from a job I really love because I want to start doing some other things. I'm still getting used to finishing those other things in 5-6 hours and then finding something to do for the other 10 that I'm awake.

I have an e-bike but as I've gotten stronger again, I've turned off the pedal assist and just ride it as a normal bike. There's a fantastic trail near me that goes through the woods and if I go around 9 AM most other people are at work and I only see trees, water and animals which is good for my spirit.

I challenged myself to compliment a stranger at least 5 days a week even if it's something simple like "cool t-shirt dude."

I restarted my Spanish lessons. I can read Spanish fairly fluently--a trashy novel is no problem, but I can't read Gabriel Garcia Marquez YET. I made a huge stride where I no longer translate to English in my head. I want to work on speaking and understanding spoken Spanish.

Finally, I had completely stopped drinking alcohol but I really like whiskey so decided that once a week, on Friday (today, YAY!), I will have a glass and savor it with my feet up and the dog on my lap.