The only thing you have control over is your optimism. I am about to receive the 2nd of 6 chemo treatments. At least, I hope it's 6. I'll get 3 then repeat PET scan and if there's enough shrinkage of Lymph nodes, I'll have a hysterectomy then 3 more rounds of chemo. I was diagnosed with stage 3c carcinosarcoma late February. I had all the expected emotions. I just went for my toxicity test and my oncologist told me all labs were back to pre-chemo levels. She said everything has already returned to normal, after 1 week of chemo. I could be fooling myself but, I am very optimistic that I'll beat this. Stress is the worst thing for cancer so I won't get depressed and have a battle with those demons on a daily basis. Some days I don't even think about the cancer. It's there. You can't "worry" it away but you can flat sure worry it into something worse, I believe. So you be optimistic and, although I know it's not the same for everyone, try your best not to dwell on it on a daily basis. Have your emotional day, few days, or week. I had mine for a week after learning results of PET scan while waiting for appt for 1st chemotherapy treatment. The very worst thing for me....I have an inheritance check I'm due to get within the next month and I don't even know if I'll be around to enjoy it. I had my daughter added to my account at the bank, did power of attorney and made out my will. Believe it or not, it is a lot less stressful now knowing I have all those things taken care of. Please stay positive. I want to believe this is just a hiccup in my life and I WILL get through it. I mean, I had legionella in 1989 and they didn't think I'd make it. I had a brain aneurysm in 2011 and they SURLY didn't think I'd survive that. I never felt like I was going to die with either one. I feel that way with this cancer. This CAN'T be how I go out. I refuse to believe it. I don't feel it. Call me over optimistic but I need those positive vibes. 😊