I'm so sorry you and your family are going through all this. And yeah, it is easy to freak out, but take a deep breath and know that it is possible to move forward and rebuild your life. You are still so young. It seems you have been on meds most of your adult life and from everything I've read and experienced - it seems coming off them should be "low and slow." Small titrated amounts over long periods of time. (It took me two years to get off lamotrigine.) It is possible to taper off, but something has to replace the meds. For me it is eating clean (organic and vegan) and walking at least 3 and a half miles a day. Have to tell you - I'm starting to come "alive" again and it is amazing. There is light at the end of the tunnel (and it's not a train.) Hang in there! Prayed for you all.