I'm sorry for all you're going through Peggy and wish you and your husband the best.
Your question is best answered by your surgeon. I'm getting my right hip replaced in a few days. It started out as mild pain in my right groin and then just got slowly worse over the last year. I didn't think it was related to the hip, but sure enough, that's where the pain is felt.
All I can say - if I start to feel the same discomfort on my left side, and the xray shows I'm bone on bone, I'm getting it replaced. I'm 70 now and have had both knees replaced. I don't want to wait until the pain is so bad Im suffering every day, as I am now because I didn't seek help earlier.
Everyones's situation is different. My message is this - if your surgeon says the joint will eventually have to be replaced, go ahead and get it replaced as soon as possible and at a time as convenient to you as possible. You may not have that luxury considering what's going on with your husband. Recovery from THR is supposed to be relatively quick, but it would still be good to have someone with you for the first few weeks.
All the best to you Peggy.
Joe
Having @heyjoe415 say the following was just what I needed to hear to help with my ambivalence: "... if your surgeon says the joint will eventually have to be replaced, go ahead and get it replaced as soon as possible and at a time as convenient to you as possible." My surgeon (at HSS in NYC) has left the decision up to me. He said it will eventually need replacing. He replaced my left hip in 2017 and his PA said i "waited too long" to replace that one. My husband's Lewy bodies dementia has gotten dramatically worse in the past 2 weeks, which is terrifying, so I feel a bit more confident I'm making the right decision to have THR in April. I agree it is best not to wait until pain interferes with functioning and sleep and fitness cannot be maintained. It's just rare to hear of people having THR based on logic and realism about one's future vs. being burdened by pain. Thank you for your help. All the best to you as well.