To @jschwing
John,
Today is/was a horrible day for me. We picked up our taxes and I noticed that the ID.me PIN numbers that our accountant is using don’t match the numbers that were generated on line by him earlier this year. Well, now my blood pressure is going crazy and you can practically hear my heartbeat across the room. This little incident will take 1 year out of my already shortened lifespan. Every little stinkin’ thing makes me c-r-a-z-y. I see my cardiologist tomorrow and he’s going to wonder why I haven’t had a heart attack or stroke yet. I read somewhere on line recently that it’s very dangerous to have constant heart palpitations ~ you could ultimately die. You and I are very similar in that none of the many, many combinations of meds worked. I’m sure my prescribers thought I wasn’t being truthful when asked if they helped. Some of the meds I only took for a day or two - this really annoyed the prescribers, but knew they weren’t right for me. I don’t have any medication for the anxiety. I used to take Ativan but I had to stop. I did go to in-house treatment to “detox” but I wasn’t very successful on the outside. I still battle with wanting to use the Ativan because of the fast relief you get but it doesn’t last long enough. I have battled with anxiety (Social Phobia) my whole life. I started medication more than 40 years ago. Prior to that, I was still very anxious but I managed to work and have a small social life. I worked in LA years ago and I had the responsibility of being a Notary. The four men who were waiting for me to write their name in the Notary Log must have wondered what drug I was on as my hands flew across the page. Unfortunately, things like this rule my life.
p.s. besides talk therapy, I have never tried any other treatment
Claudia