Connect
← Return to Why aren't doctors helping?
Discussion
Comment receiving replies
Well, she changed this last week into a different person by day.. sometimes seeming by the hour! I found her records from er visits that refer her to her oncologist due to the cancer they saw in Pelvis, renal gland, kidney & abdominal wall 😞 Her belly hurt (she says) of constipation!. After 4 days of giving her magnesium citrate she finally had BM, normal next day. Then nothing again. It was then she took to bed only going to front room once. 3rd day, Morphine increased,& Ativan. Which she didn't want all the time. Woke 4th day afternoon struggling to speak, understand. Rough pain day/night.Day 5 woke with mouth full of yuck, barely can swallow &,hadn't eaten but few bites applesauce after morphine kill the taste! By now I'm giving her drink by straw dipping. Before bed, she's yelling help me constantly, talking to her passed Mom, calling me momma. Up all night with her screaming! By daylight she could not speak! Making moans. By afternoon labored breathing,(O2 levels 34++--). She seems catatonic! She was gone by 8pm that night 😞How can that happen that fast? I'm so angry/sad! My Mommy,My Best friend gone?!!!! Uhhhhggg
Replies to "Well, she changed this last week into a different person by day.. sometimes seeming by the..."
sounds terrible. i am sorry for your loss.
Connect
I’m so sorry for the loss of your mom and best friend. Sometimes words just aren’t enough to convey the level of sympathy. But having lost my mom to cancer, I can feel your pain, emptiness and the helplessness when there was literally nothing you could do to make her better. I think being able to be with a loved one when it’s their time is a final gift we can give.
From all you’ve shared, it sounds like your mom’s cancer was very advanced. When cancer has taken over multiple organs like that and with your mom’s symptoms, her doctors used compassion in arranging hospice for her to ease her end times. I’ve been through this many times with loved ones and friends. Sadly, there comes point in the illness when chemo or surgery would not be successful and cause more trauma than the body can handle. There is simply nothing more that can be done except to try to keep someone comfortable with medication.
Again, I’m just so sorry for your loss. I’m a firm believer that when we lose someone close to us, like our mother, they continue to live on through us and give us unbelievable strength. They’re so connected to us that they become a part of us. Sending you a gentle hug.