@secretwhitepop- Yes you will get through this. Please take a step back and give yourself a break. are mourning both of your parents. How bad can this get for you - not much so don't judge yourself honey.You are in a very vulnerable position right now so over thinking things is not in your best interest. I'm laughing at myself because I'm queen of overthinking myself. I just drive myself into a tizzy!
I also take CBD oil for anxiety. If you feel apathetic it might be too much oil or maybe too much of another medicine or both. It might also be your natural defense so that you won't feel so awful, so filled with pain. How long ago did your dad die? How is your mom handling this? Can you and your mom talk about your dad?