Hi Irandall51,
I’m sorry you’re having these issues.

As far as the skin issue, is it just around the edges or is it also underneath the appliance? It could be either an allergic reaction or a moisture induced fungal infection. Each are treated differently. Or is the rash only where the stool leaks out from? The suggestions to contact a stoma specialist or your appliance manufacturer are good ones.
As far as stool sticking to the stoma and pancakeing, the above suggestions to use a lubricant as you already are is the best remedy. If your stool thick and pasty? If that why it’s sticking? If so drink more water.

I would stick to natural methods for bulking up your stool, as suggested with bananas, rice, etc. Metamucil is a good otc choice also but ask your md first.

Let us know more about the rash if you would.

Take care.