Needing medicine to soothe our nervous system does not mean anyone is a failure. I can understand what you feel because I too feel like a complete failure but I know this is not true so I counter my mind and feelings constantly struggling internally telling myself I am not a failure. Benzodiazepines are medications that now are understood to be taken in specific doses at specific times and very short term. Unfortunately, I didn't understand this years ago and had many prescriptions of Clonezepam take 1mg to 3mg as needed which is wide open to interpretation; it was misprescribed and now I am messed up from it. Had I known I would never have taken it. The long-term negative effects especially when trying to taper off or get off them create unimaginable problems long term for countless people and I suffer from the terror of getting cut off at some point in the future. In the meantime my body is dependent on Clonezepam 1 mg split exactly 12 hours apart same time daily and I hope to start slowly tapering. Unfortunately, I have developed a tolerance to the medication and I don't the feel the beneficial effects like helping me sleep as it once always did. And it can in time actually bring on more anxiety, depression and insomnia which I wonder if that's part of what is happening to me.