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Cancer won
On Sunday, my husband Joe passed away from his battle with lung cancer. He had been admitted to the Good Samartian House in Wexford, PA on February 19th. I drove him there. It is 1 1/2 hours from my house. But, oh, it was so worth it. My son took me there again on Friday, the 21st and we visited for awhile. Joe kept dozing off so we only stayed for about an hour. Plans were made to go back on Sunday when I got the first call from the nurse at 7:30 a.m. who told me he was actively dying and to try and get there earlier. Twenty minutes later, she called again to tell me he had passed. Needless to say, I broke down. I had wanted one more chance to say good bye, but the Lord had other plans. The funeral is today. But I must tell you that the Good Samartian house was the best thing for him. They were able to give him enough meds to keep him comfortable. They have 10 beds and he was the only one there. So he had excellent care. I just could never have given him the care he needed at home. Their house is beautiful. The nurses all had lots of faith in God and well, I just can't describe how wonderful they were to my husband. They told me that he died comfortably and at peace. And I believe that. I want to thank everyone on here that took the time to answer my questions and shared their experiences. This site was so helpful to me. Thank you all and God Bless All of You!
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Thank you for your kind response. The emotions you mentioned are spot on. I am grieving but at the same time I do feel relief. Then I feel quilty for feeling relieved, just as you said. I am glad that he is no longer in pain or suffering. My family and friends have been such a blessing and great support. Yes, it will take awhile because I am just feeling numb. My two dogs won't leave my side. I know that they understand something is different. But they are a great comfort, also. I don't know how I would have handled this if it hadn't been for hospice. They gave him the care I could not give him at home. I appreciate your prayers. They help. Thank you,
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1 ReactionDenise,
I just wanted to let you know that you don't have to tell every creditor that your husband died; thus giving yourself some time to get your finances in order. Some will know from Social Security or the government but not all. So take your time and pray about it. Of course, things will have to be paid eventually but having time helps. I took my time informing creditors when my husband died because Social Security and my husband's pension didn't happen for a couple months! They even stopped my Social Security because I would be getting my husband's. But that didn't occur right away. I was living totally on our savings!
I'm so glad we had some! When the pension and social security did finally occur 2 months and lots of phone calls later, things were alright and I could pay what was owed. Also if you didn't have a joint account at the bank then the bank can "hold" the account. I don't know for how long but when I found that out in my research it was frightening! However, we did have a joint account so it was OK.
I'm sorry your son is having such a hard time with his father's passing. Just remind him that his father is up in Heaven with God and Jesus and out of pain and that eventually he will be with him again.
I wish you both the best at this hard time. I'll say a prayer for you and your family.
PML
Thanks for your caring words. I may be in financial trouble because did not have a savings. And our checking accouts were not joint. They told me they would need a death certificate and a copy of the paid funeral bill. All his credit cards were in his name only. I hope I don't have to pay them because I can't. I have my own bills to pay and there is not enough left over to pay his. I will pay some of them but that will be when all the financial things get straightened out. If it takes two months to straighten the financials out, I don't know what I will do. I do have a pension but it won't cover all the bills I alone am responsible for. My husband only contributed 700 dollars towards the household bills because he spent most of what he had left on cigarettes. I pay the mortgage, electric, (that alone came to over 800 dollars) homeowners insurance, the taxes and I paid for the life insurance. I am also paying the bills for the new roof we just put on last november. Plus my own credit cards. But it was doable as long as I was getting my social security. Oh, well. God will see me through and if I get in a jam my family hopefully will kick in. Take care and thanks for the advice. (I think lol)
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