I understand how awful it is I really do. I suffer through each day. I'm holding at .5mg 2X per day 12 hours apart of Clonezepam to see if I can get to a place in my condition where I may start tapering off very slowly over a period of a long time as it is supposed to be done to possibly avoid or reduce protracted withdrawal symptoms but no guarantees. The protracted withdrawal from what I have investigated is horrible and almost unbearable with different symptoms arising and new ones never having appeared back and forth over usually years. It's scares me to death but as things are my provider still prescribed it to me in hopes of doing a slow long taper. Abrupt changes or inconsistent use of any Benzodiazepines is not good at all please be careful. I understand exactly what you mean by what happened last night. I've done it many times. Going back on your Venlaxafine so abruptly might also be risky please discuss this with your provider. Did you taper off the Venlaxafine a while ago and were you doing okay off of it? And the Ativan did you use it regularly for a long time and then stop? Please be careful and try in any way possible to get moments to try to calm yourself down. I know it's easier said than done when the chemical imbalances rage through are nervous system. Always praying for us🙏

I know exactly how it is to suffer terribly each day with the condition of depression/anxiety and all the other adverse effects that go with it like inability to want to eat and serious digestive disregulation and such. Just letting you know there are many of us in a condition like what you describe somewhat desperate for solutions. I know I am desperately seeking any small aid or help I can get.
Today I walked over to a gym and signed up. It was very difficult for me. It is a completely different world as my senses are so distorted from my disregulated nervous system. The only place I seem to find any comfort is in my bed. I have to force myself each day to do something like bathe, brush my teeth, try to get some nutritious food into my system and stay hydrated. It's very difficult and I feel trapped inside my body and mind which are very sick and disregulated. When I got home I was relieved to be in my safe zone. Had lots of anxiety the entire time I went outside. I'm stuck in an awful state of mind which I feel is chemical. I think my brain is damaged from medications over my lifetime, my own indulgence in alcoholism when I was an adolescent until 26 years old when I stopped and other family abuses and traumas. I feel ruined and incapacitated because of the condition I am experiencing. I'm not happy. I'm living one minute at a time often . Apologies for expressing how bad I feel but getting it down truthfully with another sufferer is a consoling act for me. You are not alone please hang in there.🙏

@rick98

Got blood work results back. Not all good news. I guess some of the unsatisfactory results are due to my malnutrition. The lab techs were wonderful. After telling them about my anxiety, they brought me to the head of the line.
Claudia