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My husband (Phi Beta Kappa graduate of Stanford) is sliding down that slope with only one end and, as his wife, I find myself lonely and stressed, which is not good for me. I was recently diagnosed with an aortic aneurysm. I always thought I'd outlive my husband and be able to care for him indefinitely, but my diagnosis throws a whole new light on things. Getting organized and setting things up for the future is challenging, especially as he doesn't realize that there's anything wrong with him. It's very lonely when the person you married has been replaced by a simulacrum. I know so many folks who are in a similar situation with no help to speak of. This is a crisis, much like the childcare crisis working mothers often face. Attention needs to be paid.
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Oh my...sounds so familiar. Two major issues in one marriage are at least one too many. My husband has cognitive decline (he's 88) and I have pancreatic cancer. Trying to stay stress free, eat meals without arguments, trying to remember he can't help it, keeping up with bills, food and household maintenance--I know all of you readers are doing the same thing. He leans on me so heavily for everything--every tiny little decision (should I make coffee? what's happening today? why isn't my computer (phone, etc.) working?) Asks for my opinion and then argues about it. Hard to remember the good times. I'm glad I have some photo albums and get them out to look at old pictures--and I'm grateful for a supportive family, no financial worries after being frugal for a lifetime...