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@komiskey10 I see that your tests are scheduled for next week? Is that correct? I can identify with your anxiety as I felt so very anxious after my diagnosis of endometrial cancer (endometrioid adenocarcinoma) in 2019 and especially after a recurrence in 2021. I honestly thought I was living in a nightmare. But here I am to tell the story and to say that our anxiety leads us down a path of thinking about the worst outcome. For me I have found that what I imagine is the worst outcome almost never turns out to be true and I am far more resilient than I give myself credit for.
Can you think back to a time when you felt very anxious and once you were in the actual situation you handled it better than you thought you would? Afterwards perhaps you gave yourself a pat on the back? I'm not trying to minimize how you are feeling right now--only trying to suggest that you may have more coping resources than you realize.
Is there someone who will go to your appointments with you?
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Even though my daughter has been with me and heard everything awful the oncologists have offered and is upset herself, she will be going with me to these appointments. Her support has been steadfast. It has been difficult to know if walking away from the first 2 oncologists was the right thing to do because of the additional wait time for treatment. The first two were all about cutting, no further testing. I chose to go back to Mayo Clinic because he was determined to do all testing before surgery. Hence the anxiety.... I have been given worse case scenario and pray that nothing like what they described is going to happen. Once testing is done and I know exactly what I am facing, I feel I will be better able to handle moving forward and figuring out what my new normal will be. Thank you for your kind words.