A couple of suggestions as a friend who senses your feelings. One, try my entry on prayer on this web sight. Two, I think you are ready for some stronger meds. Try to find a doc who will get you some oxycodone or hydrocodone as a regular daily drug. Yes, I know docs are resistant and hard to find. If you have any friends or family in medical jobs ask them to ask around for a name of a doc. Pharmacists know who writes scripts. You have to have tried all the earlier drugs usually prescribed like cymbalta, lyrica, nortriptoline. And maybe tried acupuncture and electrical stimulation. If you have tried all the early stuff with no help, they will probably write for you and monitor you monthly. Good luck. Jeff