My dad began eating very little of what would be called “balanced meals”. His PCP said to just give him what he will eat, which was ice cream, canned beef stew, and canned corned beef hash. The PCP said not to worry about sugar or salt, just to get something in him.
In as gentle words as I can say, the serious loss of appetite was a sign that things were advancing to an end. My mom looked in the phone book, called a nursing agency that had Hospice and asked for a referral. They came out the next day. The nurse was very, very kind. He was eligible and a lot of services were available- nursing visits, aide help, volunteer visitors weekly so my mom could take a break, regular visits from the social worker and chaplain. My dad had experienced terrible things during World War II that he had never discussed with ANYONE, the social worker and chaplain both told me that he had unburdened his heart to them. This made me so happy, thinking he did this, maybe, to feel free to meet his Lord.
The nurse did a wonderful job of educating us and taking care of pain management, although he had very little. He passed peacefully in his own comfy chair, in his own home, with his beloved wife nearby.
If you don’t want to consider Hospice yet, this is the time to make an appointment and talk with your PCP about the options for someone who stops eating- there are a variety of feeding tube options, also time to discuss DNR choices, if he doesn’t have an Advanced Directive. Hard things to talk about, but necessary.
Wishing you courage and love during this difficult time.