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What are your tips for staying independent at your own home?

Aging Well | Last Active: Feb 16 1:38pm | Replies (240)

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@woojr

Thanks Ginger, my wife has been accompanying mom on eye appointments and routine GP visits like going over results of bloodwork. I go when there is a possible need to "tell the whole story." Or like last year when her dentist did about $4000 worth of work that resulted in an infection and it all required being extracted and replaced complete lower denture. She didn't tell me about it until after she had the procedure. The best part was when we went back to the bad dentist, he gave her a strong opioid script that could have killed her. He also prescribed an antibiotic that she had listed as being allergic. I caught this at her pharmacy. This whole story is terrible and I wanted to talk to authorities about his actions. Mom insisted I don't. Fortunately her dentures are working out well and the new dentist is a very transparent and caring man. We actually communicated by text and email during the process. I've never had a dentist like him before. Anyway, mom has had a lot of freedom since she still drives. I find out when things go bad after the fact. She believes everyone. Yes, everyone. I could tell you how she's been taken advantage of by a few contractors because that's the way the real world works. Of the many things mom has taught me, it's how aging is different for different people. I'm pushing 73 and after about ten years of helping her after a mild stroke, I'm amazed by her toughness and desire to do it her way. She's watched all of her friends die over the last twenty or so years. We just spoke a few minutes ago about the Eagles game today. Her and my father were big fans who attended games in 1940's before I came along. They didn't have a car, took a bus for thirty plus miles into Philadelphia to see games. He died in 1997. She's been very independent. It helps to have enough money to fund her interests. Don't worry, she's in good hands here.

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Replies to "Thanks Ginger, my wife has been accompanying mom on eye appointments and routine GP visits like..."

Funny how that works. My father became a suspicious, unhappy curmudgeon as he aged, my mother became a more devout optimist, and I can feel myself becoming more open and gullible, just taking people at their word regardless of who they are. It's as if age is paring us away to our essential personalities.

As a result, I always call screen, clean cookies off my computer constantly, deny social media requests unless I know the individual in person, and limit access to my email address. I'm going to be a mark to be suckered eventually, so I need to think more about how to manage that risk as my judgment becomes weaker.