@mmky906 I found bereavement counseling to be very helpful. It was offered by our local hospice. But if you go on Psychology Today's therapist finder, there are many therapists who have expertise in grief.

People have a small window for condolences and then want us to move on. The reality is that grief is a years long process. In fact, the bereavement counselor told me the second year can be the deepest grief, but also a time for growth.

I think a counselor can help you with the other type of grief you are experiencing- along with the loss of your partner- the feeling that you have lost the chance to have a family, and the imagining of your future as bleak. Good luck!