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Dealing with a Spouse with a “Mild Cognitive Impairment”
Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: 17 hours ago | Replies (112)Comment receiving replies
I have responded before but I am starting to see a lot more changes. We so far have only seen his GP he suggested a neurologist but we have not seen one yet. My husband knows he is getting forgetful but we have NEVER discussed dementia or MCL. I realize tonight when the TV was on that he couldn’t read some of the word correctly. Help, where do I go from here? How does one take their partner to a doctor to be evaluated when my husband seems to think he is fine. We are fine as long as I say okay and basically agree with everything he says. I am grateful he still showers his self and dresses himself and does his chores everyday. But sometime during the day I will say something wrong and things get really testy for want of a better word.
What direction should I take now? I have been trying to deal with this on my own? Thanks so much for any suggestions?
Replies to "I have responded before but I am starting to see a lot more changes. We so..."
I could have written this. My husband will not see a doctor either, but does chores, is clean although wears the same sweatshirt several days in a row--but same with TV, same with response to my saying anything critical--absolutely can't stand criticism and goes on and on rationalizing about why I am wrong.
If I am calm, I can let this lie; I see a therapist and have learned some ways to defuse if I can maintain my self control. He gets worse with anxiety; then he is unreasonable. Calmness, having things stay the same, a little love pat, saying that I love him, encouraging him to talk on the phone with his son or one friend, encouraging his little projects (rolling up aluminum foil in balls, for example)--help keep the peace and his mind. I will also say, call our-of-state son when he gets irrational--which doesn't help during business hours. He is 88 years old, by the way; I am 84. I know he knows and it scares him to death; the future is unknown and hard to prepare for various hypothetical situations. I hope you have family help; I am fortunate--caring "children" (56 and 61). I lean on them a lot. Love and courage to you...
Hugs.. My husband realizes his memory issues. He still drives(loves google maps) . He functions on a daily basis. It the memory that frustrates him. Never say (don't you remember)
He appreciates the fact that I am navigating the doctor and neurologist appointments.
Hopefully you can get with a good doctor
I would suggest you get linked with a neurologist ASAP, if possible one that specializes in geriatrics. Your husband’s PCP should be able to do this for you. The neurologist will likely order a brain scan & send him to a neuropsychologist for testing. That is the only way you will get answers & a treatment plan.
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If you can see a therapist for you alone, you might be able to discuss strategies. It's sad, but similar to raising a child.