I have the same problem with my spouse of over 40 years! It’s very difficult to have the right headspace with a cancer that drs will tell you is the most difficult to cure. It’s a balancing act of knowing I’m dealing with a deadly disease that one day had me floating on air with a CA19-9 of “8”, and the very next day writhing in pain and being told I have a large mass and chemo is no longer working (that latter turned out to be incorrect). You must be prepared and yet be happy to live life you have left. My husband says things like your partner like take a trip to Europe a few years from now and I’m going beat this thing because I took care of my parents, or some ridiculous nonsense like that. I’m pretty calm and together, but that’s when I go ballistic and let him know how hard it is to keep my brain in the headspace of this balancing act that I need it to be in order to carry on without just being this body that sits on couch all day feeling sorry for myself (which most others expect me to be doing and congratulate me because I’m not). For me, the way I remind others that I might not have a happy ending to my story is to create a bucket list of things you want to do since you are preparing for the end. You can have fun with it! It can be simple like taking a Duffy boat ride in a local marina (these things are no way fit for the ocean!) and then going to dinner afterwards, or if you are strong enough - taking a trip or cruise. My next thing is a trip to Laughlin, Nevada. Let your partner know you aren’t so afraid about your end and maybe they will feel more comfortable about it as well. It’s scary for them, so make sure they have have a good support system that will be place even after you may not be here. Of course, I praying for a cure this year in a vaccine e or what have you, but just in case, make a bucket list of fun things to do!