One tip I can offer is visit at different times. If you visit on a regular visit, the aides know when to expect you and many of them will act so much more caring and nice. When you visit at unexpected times, you may catch some of the less nicer things going on. Keep them off guard. I am not saying that all nursing homes or assistant care homes are like that, but it is a good thing to keep in mind. They all should have an ombudsman that you can call and share any feelings that you have. they are required to check them out. From personal experience with my dad, many of the aides are only there for the money. When I retired in 2012 from the welfare office in Armstrong county pa, I was a caseworker working in the nursing home unit determining eligibility for help from the state for people. There are many rules and regulations you must meet-especially income and resources. Talking to an elder care attorney is really important if you can afford one. They know all the laws you need to know before deciding on a nursing home or an assisted living place including dementia care.