@babyblues262, I recently read this quote elsewhere on the forum: “Anxiety is an overestimation of the problem and an underestimation of your resources to deal with it”. - David Barlow, Ph.D.

I know you're terrified. The unknown is scary. It sounds like your mind is desperately trying to fill the void of the unknown and unanswered questions with uninformed answers like searching the internet.

It can help to stay focused on the present, the here and now, rather than the future. To help calm your racing thoughts try the 3-3-3 exercise:
Name 3 things you can see, 3 things you can touch, and 3 sounds you can hear.

Try some diaphramic breathing and really focus on the breath going in and out. Live today. I hope this helps you sleep tonight.

Many, if not all of us reading your post have had the very same terrifying reactions as you are. ((HUG)) As a cardiac nurse, you have, indeed, seen some of the worst case scenarios - and some of the better ones as well. It does take time to put things in perspective and to marshal your courage, you are probably overwhelmed beyond belief. We are all here and do let us know how you as your journey progresses. You will be in the BEST HANDS! That, in itself, I found comforting. I would bet that your family is glad you will be going to Rochester, shows you are willing to take charge and do everything possible to help yourself.