Connect
← Return to Caregiving: Anyone else doing this alone?
Discussion
Caregiving: Anyone else doing this alone?
Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: 4 days ago | Replies (45)Comment receiving replies
I can relate to your situation. And for me, it’s not just the duties required, but my dad often calls my name for any and no reason….like to take a cup he used to the kitchen, hand him his newspaper, go to the mailbox 20 times a day, bring him water when he already has a glass, empty his waste basket, pick him up more handkerchiefs, etc. His requests are nonstop, even when I’m having dinner. So, focusing on remote work is challenging. I have an office and plan to start using it more next year, if he’s still in the home then.
Replies to "I can relate to your situation. And for me, it’s not just the duties required, but..."
@celia16 That sounds exhausting and frustrating. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with that. My dad will open the door and walk into my office, so I hang a "do not disturb" sign when I'm in a meeting. But, if your dad is calling out to you, a sign won't help. I didn't have any good suggestions, so I asked the ChatGPT AI agent for some. You might have tried these things or are already doing them, but this is what it gave me.
Create a routine where you proactively attend to his needs at set times (e.g., bring him water, empty his wastebasket). Let him know, “I’ll check on you every hour to see what you need.”
Respond calmly but assertively to non-urgent requests: “I’ll help with that in a little while, Dad.”
Use a timer or clock to show when you’ll return to help.
Place commonly requested items (water, handkerchiefs, newspaper) within easy reach.
Use a basket or organizer for items he frequently asks for, like glasses, pens, or snacks.
Connect
My hubby constantly calls for me for no good reason. Sometimes for no reason other than "oh, I didn't know where you were". Sometimes it's urgent so I don't dare ignore him. It's a lot to deal with. This was one of his problems with skilled nursing recently. As soon as they left his room he would think of something he wanted and immediately push the call button again. Eventually, they would respond slowly and often find a toileting mess.