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Caregiver wish list: Things we would love to hear from others
Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: 17 hours ago | Replies (22)Comment receiving replies
I would like to hear from one of my kids- “we see what you have to do for Dad, when you need help, I’m here for you”.
Just finished an exhausting week- 7 MD and testing appointments- getting him in and out of the car, into and out of the buildings, on and off the examining tables, answering the questions, scheduling the next appointments, keeping him calm. Plus I have a terrible cold- wearing a mask, doped up with OTC cold meds, can’t cancel anything- the wait is months for the next appointment.
Thanks for letting me rant. Do you ever think “What about me? Who will do this for me?” I tend to repeat to myself, “Thy will be done, not mine.”
Replies to "I would like to hear from one of my kids- “we see what you have to..."
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Yes, yes all of it. This is 24/7 thought and deed.
I could feel your frustration. I know my kids care and appreciate all I do but they have their own lives and still would like things to be as they were before. I’ve had to set boundaries, lower my expectations and move on. And I lose it because I’m exhausted. Yesterday I was snapping at him and he said “ Do any of your friends talk that way to their husbands?” And I said ( and I know I shouldn’t have) “None of my friends have a husband with dementia.”
I felt bad that I said that but it’s true.
In the last couple months I had an emergency appendectomy, my husband had pneumonia and we both had COVID. Through all of it all I can think about is S.
Who is there to take care of you! And with a cold you are just plugging through.
I love him and we still work on this together to enjoy life but it is hard. And he does appreciate me but also feels I’m picking on him or always telling him what to do. He needs 24/7 guidance. It’s hard. And he needs a hug and appreciation for what he can do and tries to do.
Do you have any help? Friends? Family? Hired help?
We do have friends who will pick S up and take him out but not to doctors and hospitals for tests.
Who are you without your husband? Do you have anything you do just for you?
Hugs to you and give yourself a hug.
I hope you are able to get some rest in between all you have to do.