Apparently, I can only respond on my cell phone and not on a computer. I do not understand all the computer requirements that are in place in order for me to attempt to write you back. This whole computer world drives me nuts but keep in mind that I’m very much older than you And never really learned about computers so I am relying on my speaker and all the mistakes it seems to make.
I’m so sorry you have so much to deal with and you are so young. And I wish you did not have to have further surgeries going forward. Not to be negative, but I have seen people that I’ve had too many surgeries and it is not good.
I have tried pretty much all the medication’s you mentioned and I have tried so many creams. As far as the burning, I cannot use ice. It makes me totally crazy and worse. I find that a heating pad is more soothing.
I’m really not in good care from my point of view since I feel like I’ve basically been pushed over to the side of the road being a senior. This is not important to anybody including doctors. I have not been able to find a therapist unless I can pay out-of-pocket, which is extremely expensive. And of course you’re right if I could find someone to talk to, that is a form of support. Also not having a dog anymore is a killer. I want a little senior dog and although there’s places that specialize in senior rescue, they are not Close to me. There’s a great one in San Francisco but I need to be there in person and they have mostly little dogs, which is what I want. There’s another place in San Diego, again. I cannot get there in person. My driving is limited and even at that it’s very painful since my feet carry 70% of my pain. The Neurosurgeon office tells me that she does surgery, but they cannot help me in terms of answering any of my questions about my physical battle, my inability to take pain medication.(which of course I would need with surgery). It’s all rather cold and without much concern.
I do have spinal compression, cervical compression which she said is causing my balance problems. I know in my heart that I would not be able to recover and even if I could, it would take several years so at age 82 it’s not something I feel I should even attempt.. I have so little time left to be here, to be alive, even though I can’t really call what I am alive. The pain just consumes as I’m sure it must for you.
But for your son and for your dog, you have incentive and love.
I never was fortunate to have children. Just a stepdaughter from hell.
And I am married to a man who has not been my partner for 18 years. A man without empathy or compassion. As much as this sounds terrible I am jealous that he has no pain and sleeps through the night. Other than that, he does nothing productive. He was once a very vital, active working man in a very top golfer. We actually had a life although I know now he is a narcissist. I regret that I stayed to keep saving his life. In truth, I had nowhere to run to! My family consisted of my mother who had a terrible life, and I was fortunate enough to be able to be her caretaker, her friend, until she left. I did not grow up in a family, and only started living with my mother at age 12. Long story but Will hold back.
By the way, some of the creams you mentioned have pepper and if it’s anywhere near my feet, I go insane so I’m careful not to make that mistake again
I think that is something for people who have numbness and it gives sensation to the nerves. My nerves are overactive.
My nerve damage is widespread and now coupled with back pain, balance, tremendous physical pain, I’m scared. I won’t have another dog because I question if I can take care of anything.
My husband is my biggest disappointment and my heart is forever broken. He doesn’t even try to imagine what I am going through.
I know your dog knows and probably your son and because they love you, they feel you.
I will pray for you because you are kind. And because you love animals.
I am trying to find the courage to keep going, but I want it all to end.
There is no moment in the day or night that my body is at peace. The nights are even harder because I can’t sleep at all, and my legs are desperately painful.
I will remember that I cannot use the computer to reply because even though it tells me to verify my email which I do, I cannot logon to comments except on my phone. I know there’s a way, but there is no one to ask for help.
God bless, and I wish you so much love on your most difficult journey.
If I hear from you again, I will respond. Computer wise I am not literate.
Blessings ❤️🙏🐕