Any suggestions for the wife on how to support my husband?

I don’t see anyone mention the painful ride home the day after surgery. I just remember how painful it was sitting in a seat, I was able to lay back as far as it would go, didn’t help. I lay down in the back of the car across the seats. I didn’t have padding and the seat was uncomfortable on the drive home, it was a painful hour.

Coming home is ok the 2nd day but sitting in a seat in the car for more than even 20 minutes is going to be real uncomfortable, if your husband has a high pain threshold maybe he can do it. I was even on painkillers, but that didn’t help. If you have room to lay down across the back seats or a station wagon or equivalent vehicle in which he can lay down, great! Have padding for the seats or floors and a blanket or comforter, it would really help.

I have a couple of very soft pillows/cushions permanently in the car for this very reason. Also under "might happen or might not..." When driving, try to avoid roads with speed bumps - or any bumps. I pee every time.

Edited to say.... I love how you're headed to 50 replies. This is a great thread cause it give us guys a different perspective & brings out a lot of "I wish I knew before..."

Sorry to hear it, get a PSMA scan just to be sure where it is and isn't just for certainty. I looked at proton a bit, seems you have to travel on that too. Though one might be near you depending on where you are, but has some aspects as far as radiation goes and you go down that route. My thoughts and prayers with you all for the best outcomes.

Thanks for that! I usually drive a Fiat but we already agreed his SUV is the better option. I’ll pack extra pillows & blankets. Two hour drive home for us so I hope they give him pain meds to at least get home somewhat comfortably. I’ll ask at Pre-op about that.

Ok that’s a tip I wouldn’t have thought of - thanks!

I have stage IV prostate cancer which has metastasized throughout my bones and lymph nodes. I am at the five year point of dealing with this . The oncologist has run out of things to do.

The most important thing I have received from my wife is her unwavering moral and emotional support. It's very easy to feel like you are alone in this battle and have been abandoned. It's very important to be 100% consistent.

I am so sorry to hear that.
We are definitely in this battle together 100%. I wish I had some sage advice to offer but we are just starting this rollercoaster ride. (At the ride point where scary drop is in sight & wishing we didn’t get on)
Thanks for sharing your story.

The journey is unknown but it doesn't have to be scary.

We all fight it the best we can. Àt some point comes the recognition that no one lives forever, we all die some day from some thing and need to content ourselves with the knowledge that we did the best we could with the knowledge we had available to us.

I wouldn’t have made it this far without my wife, she is truly one of God’s greatest gifts.
My journey is in its 8th year, be careful with the meds, if he is on the pain killers for more than a couple of days, add a stool softener or two.
BM’s can be a challenge, and watch for depression, it’s coming, just being there will help you both get through it. It’s a tough row to hoe but I think you have what it takes to get it done.
Stay strong, and question and research everything.
This site will be invaluable.