I am so sorry you are having such pain, Frank. I understand how you feel. I have RA (rheumatoid arthritis), Sjogren's, fibromyalgia, spinal stenosis, osteoporosis and IBS. I am on antidepressants and various other medications. I am not on any daily pain medication. I take Aleve when I need to and, in extreme pain cases, I will take one Tylenol with codeine - but that is very rare as I don't like taking them. I have severe dry eye and mouth due to my Sjogren's - it is an immune disorder that attacks the mucus membranes. I am on a medication called cermiville (? spelling) for my Sjogren's. It seems to help. I just do natural tear eye drops throughout the day. I can no longer wear contacts - which is a bummer. I have had these conditions for almost 15 years now. In the very beginning, I was extremely depressed. I used to be thin and active - sky diving, scuba diving, hiking, horseback riding, etc. Now I do well if I can walk around for more than a few hours. I have slowly come to accept the "new" me. I had to mourn the younger me, the more vibrant me, but I realized that this was just a new chapter in my life. The things that made me who I am were still there. I walk and try to swim to stay active. I pace myself. I know if I overdo it, I will have a flare. I just accept it. For me, my faith has been the biggest factor in dealing with the depression and pain. I am so glad you are seeing a therapist. If you have found a good one, they can be of real help. I actually do what I used to think were kinda hokey things - actually taking time to be thankful for what I have; counting my blessings like my children, grandchildren, family and friends; trying to be positive and stop the negative self talk; trying to stay active and engaged with family and friends; and, praying. Nothing changes over night. It is a continuing process and sometimes, even now, I slip. But for the majority of the days, no longer feel sorry for myself or wonder "why me" - especially when I think of others who are truly much worse than I. I don't know if this helped you or not! I will keep you in my prayers. It is a struggle, but I feel you can do it. The fact that you are reaching out for help shows you have the spirit to fight!