Hello joiedevivre,
I think in French that means “joy of life”? I haven’t taken French since high school, so forgive my translation. Your husband’s journey sounds similar to mine, but common ground is attained based on the mutations. Mine are KRAS12D, ATM, TP53, and a 4th I never see posted. My surgery was in the mid and tail section of the pancreas. I had 12 rounds or I received 2 infusions of chemotherapy each month for 6 months. After 4 months of no longer receiving chemo, it spread to my liver and possibly it was always around my hepatic artery and abdominal peritoneum. Those areas light up on PET scan but the peritoneal area wasn’t seen on the CT and my biopsy was negative for it. Radiologists say scar tissue but oncologists assume it’s cancer to be in the safe side. I haven’t had any growth on them but I do have occasional pain in those areas.
Right now I’m on GA chemotherapy and will be until some other cure comes along. I was on a short 2-3 week break from the chemo after which time a nodule showed up on lung and a lesion lit up in my femur after a PET scan. I did become depressed at that time and my UCLA oncologist offered the assistance of a marriage and family counselor to speak with. Most oncologists g will be able to put you in contact with one. I spoke with her by phone since I was feeling anxious/depressed at that time. It did help and I highly encourage finding someone like that to speak with. It’s good to have a community to reach out to like siblings, friends, old coworkers, children, neighbors, etc, and of course this forum would be good for your husband to jump on and ask questions or about feelings he might be having. I also created a bucket list of things to do. I don’t like to fly so mine are simple like going to a concert, or going out to a restaurant you wouldn’t go to under typical circumstances as it might be bit pricey. There are so many when you really think about them. The chemo itself didn’t cause depression or anxiety (the two often go hand in hand or can be mistaken for the other). There is anxiety about moving on to the next place in time. My crux has been my faith. I go to church when I can or watch the mass online. I get as many blessings for the sick as I can. I’ve spoken with the priest at my parish. I hope your husband has a faith he can rely on or this might be a good time to find some. Is he eating ok? I take protein shakes and plenty of other foods and vitamin b12 to help me be strong. When I was feeling weak a lot of it had to do with the chemotherapy playing havoc with my underlying cardiac arrhythmia as a high heart rate can you make feel weak. I found a good cardiologist that prescribed the right medication for my rapid heart rate. I don’t know where you live, but hopefully the weather is nice enough to take short walks outside? Please try and get your husband to join in on the forum and I’m so glad you are leading him to this!