Connect
← Return to Confusing Messaging about Prostate Cancer
Discussion
Confusing Messaging about Prostate Cancer
Prostate Cancer | Last Active: Nov 3 8:02pm | Replies (76)Comment receiving replies
The difference is dying probably quickly and painlessly as opposed to a very slow agonizing death.
Not only do I personally know men who’ve died of this disease but two of my Drs have said to me “…you DON’T want to die from prostate cancer…”
I don’t think it was a scare tactic; we’ve all experienced side effects from treatment and some of them are not pleasant. I never want to experience the side effects of the disease itself - terrible bone pain, spinal deterioration from metastasis, liver impairment causing just about every metabolic problem you can imagine.
I know we always talk about quality of life as it pertains to ending treatment for a more comfortable passage to the inevitable. But I’m not so sure with this one. JMHO
Replies to "The difference is dying probably quickly and painlessly as opposed to a very slow agonizing death...."
“ The difference is dying probably quickly and painlessly as opposed to a very slow agonizing death.”
Yes, it does seem to be about maintaining a sense of control over “how” we go. Each person seems to have their own take on that, given what they have heard, experienced or read, and who they trust as a reliable expert. That may be a parent, doctor or minister, or authoritative book to name a few. I have heard it said that “resistance to pain is suffering”, and that pain is part of life. So the question arises in my mind, “Is resistance to pain resistance to life itself?” And, “Does acceptance of pain provide us with a different perspective on life? These are questions I think we each must face as we progress on our journey.
So, I've already experienced the spinal deterioration — by the time my PCa was detected, I had a huge lesion on my middle spine that they had to remove with > 10 hours of emergency surgery, then replace everything they gouged out from T1 to T5 using cement and metal bars.
I'm not saying it's a picnic, but I don't want others who already have bone metastases to panic and think they're doomed. It took a while, but after 3 years I can walk again, clear snow, garden, etc. I'm not pain free — low/moderate pain is a constant companion — but I've been off nerve-pain meds since spring 2023 and am doing fine with only the occasional Tylenol before bed when I think pain might keep me awake.
Treatment has improved dramatically in the last few years, and I credit that for the fact that I'm *not* experiencing all the horrors @heavyphil and others remember friends/family going through in the past.
It's not lucky having prostate cancer, but if you have to have it, it's very lucky having it in 2024 rather than 2014 (or even 2019 to some extent). But for < diety>'s sake, make sure you take that treatment, or you'll be no better off now than you eould have been then.
Connect
My father died of prostate cancer. His last few days he was on an extreme amount of narcotics to help with the pain, but they also resulted in him being out of it, barely able to even able to talk to anyone.
He had an incredible pain tolerance. He had all of his back teeth, ground down and crowned without novocaine. Would come home and eat dinner with us every night after having that done. Prostate cancer pain is intolerable near the end. You don’t want to go there.