Bless you for all you have done to keep you both together, but the care is no longer possible and you need a life too. I hope someone says that to me someday.
My husband is still doing ok most of the time. He has MCI that is progressing. We just put our deposit down for a new independent living apt under construction to be completed in 2026. It is part of a CCRC with all levels of care. Eventually he will need memory care but I am hoping to keep us “together” as long as possible in the new apt. My fear is he will progress faster than its completion and he would not be able to enjoy it with me.
We would still be “together” except in different living spaces but within the same complex.
Right now I have help a day or two a week and I know I will need more. And I will have help there.
You have done what you can and you will continue to be there for your husband but as his partner and favorite companion.
I know guilt is part of this and can’t tell you to stop feeling but if it’s at all helpful, you are still taking care of him by getting him the best care.
57 years of marriage is quite a journey and the love story continues with a different twist.