Our son, now 34 years old was diagnosed with Schizophrenia 16 years ago.
He was compliant for a year taking medications then whet on a vacation with a friend and stopped taking them. He moved in with a girlfriend with her parents 500 miles from home. He managed somehow without taking medications to work partime and finish his certification in welding.
They moved into an apartment but after another year they split up.
He quit his job and then fell apart. We helped him move up to our house, tried getting him involved with activities and a therapist. Then Covid came.
He started regressing more, personality changes (alpha male). Some days good others horrible. He got out of control driving, verbly, and damaging walls in .
We had to do a 5150 in order to get him help.
Most difficult but necessary move in our lives.
After two weeks in a hospital to get him stabilized he was placed in our city’s Behavioral Health system and began a program to rehabilitate. Unfortunately he met a girl there and they took off on a California journey. They returned, got an apartment with our help and seemed ok for 9 months when she (personality disorder) called for help but the police took him to our local detention jail awaiting trial. Once he got out 3 days later we took him to a hospital to get help as we couldn’t take him back to our house. They sent him to another hospital to get treatment. He returned to the program where he started the year prior, this time he stuck with it as his girlfriend had committed suicide when he was in jail. He spoke to a grief counselor weekly.
He was moved to two other houses with more responsibilities and freedom.
After a year they found him an apartment in a new complex that is for homeless, AA, Drug abuse, …..he became assistant manager there gaining skills. Met another very young girl there, and they got the 1 bedroom fully equipped kitchen with W/D too. He is still taking his medications, and talking to his case manager and psychiatrist monthly. He and Lily moved into a different complex that was less stressful housing families with issues.
After 1 month she called us late at night saying he hadn’t been acting himself.
Apparently during their move he left behind his medications and a good portion of both their belongings were still in their previous apartment
We brought him up to our house that night, got him back on meds, and he was given a 3 month medical leave from work until he stabilizes.
She then broke up with him.
He is hopeful to return by January to start a different job helping kids.
Meanwhile he is living with us (we’ve been away for almost 6 weeks and relying on his sibling, Aunt and uncle to fill in to make sure he’s eating, exercising, and not isolating which he does when depressed. )
So , relapses can happen even when on medications.
Fortunately we have always been able to get him to sign the Release of information (HIPAA) from his doctors so we can talk to them.
That is a BIG plus in helping your loved one.
We need to find him a place to live when we return , he doesn’t cook much, eats poorly when on his own, and won’t take care of himself as well as when around a roommate or us.
It’s a tough life for everyone. I can’t imagine living in his shoes. He has gained some insight to his illness even though he is still unsure his medications help. He keeps his appointments when he is reminded.
It’s a Day to Day challenge to move forward.
We took the 12 week NAMI course which is invaluable.
They also have local weekly chats with others on a zoom, that I highly recommend .

I hope my story brings hope to others and support.