@briarrose and @ead, As with my son, he also argues EVERYTHING I say. If everything points to something being the color black, he will somehow argue it is white. I feel like it may be due to him not feeling like he has a lot of control in his life, that the universe is against him, and that's 'just the way it is" and has "excepted it." (Whoa is me). This has shaped his personality, lacking the ability to understand or care about the feelings of others. If he is feeling crumby than others should too. As with Narcissism, behind the mask of extreme confidence, they are not sure of their self-worth and are easily upset by the slightest criticism. I have started to ask "what" questions. Example: What has you wanting to belittle me? What has you wanting to hurt my feelings? What is it about that, that has you raising your voice?
Or perhaps turn the tables: "Not having the fan work over the stove (or whatever isn't working) must really bother you, for you to have to mention it. Feel free to head to the store and buy what you need to fix it. Your dad and I really appreciate you noticing and your willingness to help." Just a thought.