Connect
← Return to I feel like start running and not look back!
Discussion
I feel like start running and not look back!
Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: 2 days ago | Replies (124)Comment receiving replies
One never knows what the future holds. Our sons have invited us to live with them but I don’t want to put our daughter in laws to go through this. They all have their own crosses to bear. They don’t need any extra. We had the same pt said a trip back to see his sister(1000 miles car trip) would be good. He enjoyed seeing members of his family. I was exhausted. Was told to get someone in to help & for me to get out. Only thing if I am not around he becomes anxious looking for me. Fortunately he is not a wanderer. Yes it is difficult it was how he was doing his finances before being diagnosed that was bad. His philosophy changed to don’t worry we’ll pay this later. Credit cards were out of control.
Replies to "One never knows what the future holds. Our sons have invited us to live with them..."
@wmehan I’m so sorry that people are thoughtless at times. What you might do is write a note (on the portal) to these doctors and say exactly what you said here. Doctors, and others, think they are being helpful, but…..
Can you tell us what you’re next plan will be?
Connect
@wmehan I find it extremely frustrating when well meaning friends, family, even medical professionals suggest something they think may be good for hubby with no regard for how it will affect me. Especially when the suggestion is made in front of him. He then becomes obsessed with the idea (of travel, dinner out, trip to the theater...) . Often, someone will tell him what he needs to do to get medical attention and I don't know what they said, only know that whatever it was made him scared and anxious. The worst was when he was in hospital or skilled nursing and providers asked if I was spending the night, in front of hubby. Didn't they understand this was the only respite I could get?
I saw this with my mom and dad when he had dementia. Everyone trying to help him and never considered the stress on her. Fortunately, they had 6 children who recognized her needs and moved him to memory care when the time came. Wish we had done it sooner. It would have been better for them both.