The narrowing of our own lives and enjoyable activities that are no longer possible without struggle or conflict, takes a heavy toll on us as caregivers for spouses with dementia. I'm not sure family members realize how much we would like to get our lives back, at least some of it. We can't travel, Dr and dental appointments are frought with tension and resistance, paranoia and separation anxiety keep us distanced from friends and relatives and unable to have personal private time. We keep doing what needs to be done but our own quality of life is rather joyless. And, as Bill said before, the Cavalry is not coming.