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My husband has all symptoms of prefrontal lobe dementia: Overwhelmed
Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: Sep 21 1:09pm | Replies (4)Comment receiving replies
Start journaling and making notes about major forgetful incidents. It is good for you to realize you aren't mistaking things; and good to show a neurologist. My husband would not get tested for hearing, or memory or for anything. I had to wait it out until he had a fall and had to have CAT scans and other tests. He finally went to a neurologist who was not all that helpful, to be honest. Over time, he became disoriented and took unsafe treks and drives back "home." Home -meaning in another state where he was born and hadn't lived in decades. The neurologist finally gave him the ALZ label and took away his driver's license. If you don't write down your observations, you will be gaslighted into thinking it is "your" problem, not his. It can be a slow or galloping pace of demise. Take over the household $, everything before things get worse. Learn how to tread water. That is how it feels every day.
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My impulse was to deny and hide, but I knew I couldn't.
I documented changes in my husband's behavior, like forgetting the names of objects, withdrawing from social life, not doing our taxes, not wanting to shower or wash his hair, etc. With his permission, I gave the notes to our PCP who started the ball rolling with basic memory tests, then referral to a neurologist.(Without my husband's permission I would have done it anyway).
I wound up taking care of things that my husband couldn't anymore, putting our financial affairs in order, and getting all the passwords to accounts that he used to manage, assuming more and more responsibility, power of attorney, etc. That started aboiut five years ago.
He also stopped driving when the neurologist recommended it. I think he was relieved to give up driving and all the other tasks he was struggling with.
It was all overwhelming in the beginning, and heartbreaking, but it's what we have to do for our loved ones and our own sanity. I found it got easier as I came to terms with our new normal.
In the beginning, I shared his diagnosis with friends and family on a need to know basis, but now his condition is obvious so I'm more forthcoming with people we encounter.