Lisa, I attended the World Conference on Lung Cancer at the beginning of this month and learned the best question to ask your doctor about upcoming treatment. Like all good questions, it starts by asking yourself a question: What are your treatment goals?

A person with a 12-year-old daughter and a 10-year-old son might strongly desire to see them graduate high school. Such a person could decide to ask their doctor to kill this thing inside as thoroughly and quickly as possible; side effects be damned!

At the other extreme, a 78-year-old patient who learns that aggressive treatment would mean they have to move out of their home and into a retirement home might decide to seek the most comfortable treatment that allows them to remain in their home.

First, you and your husband should decide on your treatment goals. Express these goals to your doctor and ask what his or her plan is to help you achieve them. Hopefully, that's the beginning of a productive conversation.

I sincerely wish you and your husband all the best. I was first diagnosed when I was 58. I'm still working full-time, helping NASA return people to the moon, and doing a lot of yard work after our recent stormy weather! And be sure to take care of yourself. Being the caregiver is also tough.