It’s best not to depend on written/phone recommendations. It is a truism that determined people will come up with false recommendations- you may be reading something they themselves wrote or you’re actually talking to one of their friends or a relative. The best way is to first Google the person’s name, look for people of the “right” age and in your area. If you are on Facebook, do a search for the person’s name, you can quietly learn a lot and checking out their page is anonymous. You would be surprised what comes up on the general Google search- issues with the law/courts appear in newspapers, so that pops up first.
Next- change an interior doorknob set (linen closet? spare bedroom? door to the basement?) to a locking set and store things in there you don’t ever want to lose (for me- pieces of my mom’s jewelry, extra bank checks, tax returns).
Then, when the person comes, of course, stick around to keep a distant check on what’s happening. As you feel comfortable, you can exit for longer periods of time.
Another consideration- if you go with an agency, it’s more expensive, but the workers have already been vetted and have a supervisor, so that person will sort out any problems or concerns. Also, if the CNA calls off, another will be sent. This is a career of primarily young women, so there can be alot of call-offs- the babysitter cancels, there’s car trouble, a child is sick, etc.
Lastly, CNAs are very appreciative if you are very clear as to what you want done. Having a list (in order) at the first visit is essential- for ex: please help him get up, get washed (there are the supplies), dressed (there are the clothes), make breakfast (this is what he eats, this is where he sits), give him his pills (here they are), these are the snacks he likes, this is the TV channel he likes, he should get a shower on these days (there are the supplies and extra towels), and on and on. Then add the extra jobs that will help you- please change his bed on shower days ( I’ll put out the sheets), please wash/dry/put away his clothes on these days (here is the laundry room, there are the supplies).
If you go with a private person, it’s also important to think about and be clear with each other about job expectations- do you expect the CNA will eat lunch with him or does she expect she will have a half-hour lunch to eat/relax/make a call or two out on the porch or in her car? Does she expect you to pay for the full agreed-upon time if she arrives late or needs to leave early or do you expect to pro-rate? Which holidays does she expect off (Federal, state)? Are you expecting she will drive him to places, is she comfortable with that and has a valid drivers’ license?
Getting off on the right foot from the very beginning will help set the tone, you’ll have thought about what you need/want and everybody knows what’s expected on each side.