Thank you so much! It has become even MORE of a nightmare. I did try Swirca, thank you for reseawrching for me!! I have been in the hospital again the past 2 days. Turned out the reason i couldnt' do anything/breathe was I had fluid on my lungs from the lobectomy. I just figured it was normal. Only when I started coughing and gasping Saturday night did I realize something was wrong. So they hospitlized me for a DAY for what I learned yesterday was an out-patient prodecdure done by a NP! So much more stress because my rabbits had gotten into a major fight when one got out right before this happened and i couldn't catch one to see if he had injuries. So sat in the hospital thinking i;d have a decaying pet when i got home when there was no need to BE in the hospital. So now lobectomy has been 3 1/2 weejs and i am just now starting to breathe. I feel like i won't recover now since i've been so long with the lung hindered from the fluid. Both oncologists have now kinda told me to go with the other one because i am still too sick and sore to undergo the port placement so i canceled it...was set for next week the 4th. No way can my body take this. how long is it supposed to be from lebectomy to port placement to chemo? Seems i am letting this apread because everything has gone wrong and again, no home health aide who may have recognized this was more than it was and gotten the fluid off sonner. just a disaster. So i don't know what i am doing now. Seems i should be asking the easiest way to kill myself at this point when the cancer spreads. I just don't know when i will feel like having a port put in. I still cant do anything. house is covered in trash and now rabbit feces allllllll over since the fight. sheesh. no idea but thank you. Social worker did talk to me again yesterday at hospital. no help availble so i just am tired of fighting and nothing going right.