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Introductions: Are you caring for someone with dementia?
Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: Mar 17 6:30pm | Replies (762)Comment receiving replies
HELP !! I have a brother diagnosed with schizophrenia , in denial for 40 years now. He went through college, grad school, and law school; practiced law for 30 years. Lived in a pig-sty, lived off credit cards, didn't pay taxes. etc etc We have picked up the pieces endlessly, paid back taxes and credit cards. Now "retired," he is only getting worse. We support him, and in return he is abusive (verbally). Made himself diabetic through terrible eating habits. Now he is becoming physically impaired as well as mentally. We are now older and just can't take it anymore. Another close relative tells us that taking care of him beyond financially (no matter how bad it gets), is a "test from God." It seems to me that a man who has 3 advanced academic degrees and (however badly) practiced law for 30 years, has some responsibility for himself. Any opinions or suggestions will be welcome.
Replies to "HELP !! I have a brother diagnosed with schizophrenia , in denial for 40 years now...."
Hello @jshdma That sound like a very difficult situation!
Only my opinion here, but I do not think God sends this kind of thing to anyone, nor does he test anyone in these ways. Little bothered me more than when someone would say to me, as I took care of my wife "god doesn't give you more than you can handle". First, that isn't the quote and second sometimes things ARE more than a person can handle.
If your brother has been in denial for 40 years, getting him to change his situation now seems highly unlikely to me.
Does he take his medications for his schizophernia? If so do they help?
Hi @jshdma - I agree with @IndianaScott and @hopeful33250 - I don't think God sends us those kind of tests. Your brother's situation sounds like one that you've dealt with for a very long time and it sounds as if it is deteriorating. I think Teresa's idea of contacting an attorney and a counselor is excellent. In addition to that, could you contact your local Council on Aging to see what other support services might be available - for him and for you?
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Some doctors won't tell you that diabetes can cause other problems. It is associated with hearing loss, blindness, obesity, and, worst of all dementia. It can destroy the brain. It is linked to hoarding, loss of smell, and other peculiar behaviors. You can predict the disease in some people. Today doctors use a scale and measure people's waist for one sign. Responsibility is a good word to use in the conversation. I tried hard to not enable my late husband with his poor choices. learn what that word means in your life. Dorisena