When I was part of a support group on the web for studying narcissism and domestic abuse, many victims wanted to do revenge and encouraged me greatly, to try to make me feel better in some way. I could never accept revenge as a response due to my Christian beliefs and developed a sense of humor to cover my depression at times. When there was a campaign years after his death and plenty of opportunities to donate, for tax reasons mostly when I sold land, my daughter encouraged me to donate to the Domestic Violence Center campaign and it turned out to fit my need for justice without revenge and I have helped others in the community greatly. It feels good and some days I can even laugh at the idea that my husband would have never seen the need for such a charitable donation.
Your response to abuse and grief is important for healing and peace of mind. I recommend it if you are able. I sent his clothes to a Children's Home that specializes in therapy and mental health rehab and has clients to the age of 21, so they could use large clothing.
I have not done other charity in his memory, but he was a well known businessman and I wanted to maintain our family respect in a manner that was honest but not revealing of his problems. Only a few people knew how he treated me for so many years. It is over and I have resisted journaling the bad parts of our life or condemnation. We learn from this to help others. Dorisena