@daun44 - Thank you so very much.

I really appreciate your specific suggestions; they are really helpful.

Besides being here on MCC, may I ask if you've had any success through your life finding friends, even acquaintances, you feel safe enough with to share these life experiences?

I've found few, if any, who can look past the outward appearance of my life & my family & hear what I have tried to share has been so unrelentingly sad, grief-filled, and heartbreaking, yet invisible.

Appreciate your sharing any experience & how to find real-life persons - outside of therapists - who could be a source of calm, assurance, and maybe even safety. (With all due respect, any religious setting is not going to work for me. )

Thank you, thank you!