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My husband has MCI. I noticed that his driving was getting worse, like driving with an inexperienced teen driver. I knew the day would come that he'd need to stop driving, and I feared it would be because he'd gotten so bad, and that's what happened, a near miss at freeway speed with another driver. And, he still wanted to drive after that; yelling argument ensued and I stood my ground, telling him he could no longer drive because his brain was giving him incorrect information. Now he's a front seat driver and it infuriates me, because he's telling me how to drive and commenting on every move I make. I ask him to stop, because an upset driver is a worse driver.
Replies to "My husband has MCI. I noticed that his driving was getting worse, like driving with an..."
Oh Judi, can I relate "Now he's a front seat driver and it infuriates me, because he's telling me how to drive and commenting on every move I make." We have always shared driving, but there are many more situations now where I take the wheel, as he is confounded by instructions from the GPS, especially when he won't wear his hearing aids. And in unfamiliar surroundings or heavy traffic he gets very flustered.
Now I put my brain on "bypass" when he starts in; think of something pleasant or concentrate on the traffic. If he accuses me of not listening, I say "Oh my tinnitus is really loud today, I didn't hear you."
My husband is also a front seat driver.
I always thank him for his help and tell him I appreciate it;-)
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I think my husband had an easier transition to losing his driving license because the edict came from the doctor, not me. It was a Band-Aid ripped off with no forewarning which, in retrospect, made it easier. I wish I had done equal driving with him all through our 57 years together. Taking on our finances, driving, selling , buying, moving, renovating. It is overwhelming. I wish I had chipped away at it all a long time ago; shared more overseeing of the household. Young couples today seem to be doing that naturally. Old school people like me had the "boy" and "girl" jobs at home and now I'm struggling with the practical running of a household besides dealing with a spouse afflicted with ALZ. Quite the challenge, but it appears that I've landed on my feet, so I can keep going. Get your ducks in a row now before you are forced by circumstances to take over.