Prostate cancer radiation failed

Cyberknife...

I just wanted to say thank you to all...Thank you...for all your suggestions, concerns and genuine compassion. The original comment I made had the statement "Going to die of something, why not this". To be clear, this is not a comment about giving up or suicide. Not at all, but most incorrect was, "Going to die of something...". I am not a preacher in any since of the profession and at a point in my life was incredibly angry with God. Like everyone, we all have challenges in our life. My life was filled with them, at points I wanted to see the end of it. Not by suicide, though it crossed my mind many times throughout the years. I remember sitting in a van with my mother when I was about 8 years old saying I wish I was dead again. I don't remember the situational reason, but it was interesting that I said "... dead again". Something happened when I was that age, but I did not see it as death. At 8 yrs old, this is a matter of fact age. M

I just wanted to say thank you to all...Thank you...for all your suggestions, concerns, and genuine compassion. The original comment I made had the statement "Going to die of something, why not this". To be clear, this is not a comment about giving up or suicide. Not at all, but most incorrect was, "Going to die of something...". I am not a preacher in any since of the profession and at a point in my life was incredibly angry with God. Like everyone, we all have challenges in our life. My life was filled with them, at points I wanted to see the end of it. Not by suicide, though it crossed my mind many times throughout the years. I remember sitting in a van with my mother when I was about 8 years old saying "I wish I was dead again". I do not remember the situational reason in the van, but it was interesting that I said "... dead again". Something happened when I was that age, but I did not see it as death. At 8 yrs old, this is a matter-of-fact age for me. Meaning to me, doesn't this kind of thing happen to everyone? I had a medical drug reaction that caused my body to stop. An Anaphylaxis event they called it and I stopped breathing. I remember being in another place, sitting on a hill at night in the winter. Looking down in a valley at an old log cabin. Someone showed up, a little conversation and back awake in my body. Such a peaceful loving feeling while in that valley, any words I could use would give it no proper description. Not understanding what death was, I had no though of what happened to be death. I was still alive and remembered everything about it. To cut short to the point, for me there is no death. The events, challenges in my life, I never saw death as a result. I knew the body stops, but the life we are continues. Throughout my life, from reckless acts to down right foolish acts, I knew there was something beyond this physical experience when the body stops. Cancer hit my life, had a heart attack just a couple weeks before I was to have surgery and pisted of beyond description. My next alternative to battle cancer was radiation. A psa of 52, they wanted me to have a PSMA Pet before they would go and treat, to see if my cancer was still in the prostate. The PET scan should it was still local to the prostate and they radiated via Cyberkinife. Many of us are in challenges still dealing with cancer in our life. I know cancer in my life seeing most of my family, extended families, friends, and others bodies be torn by it. To include pets that we were able to have euthanized from their pain out of compassion for them. Humans seem to be left battling cancer with still and other procedures that tear the body up as well. Wanting time, or more of it to be with loved ones or other things left unaccomplished, that they wanted to do in their life. All the power and hope that they are be able to have the time extended for their wishes. For me, that experience of and undesirable peace, love and compassion has left me looking forward to being in that place again. These things truly missing in this world that many experiences have brought both in and out of my military service. I have known and experienced both the evil and love in this life, but knowing there is a life beyond this one, for the best I have touched without pain and other evils as seen in this physical world; I cannot describe the desire to be in it. I know to get there, there is a right of passage to achieve it. My cancer is just another of many of the other cancers like war to be experienced to accomplish passage and appreciation of this unconditional love and peace felt as that child stating, “wanting to be dead again’. But, yet not really dead. To be living in that other place where life experiences continue with indescribable things as peace, love, and compassion. So, if this cancer is another challenge, so be it. I have seen its endgame of pain and destruction in others. Not unlike the other cancer like experiences I or many have had in our life. Treatments to ease the pain, extend the longevity of this life are still a thought, but not something on my plan now. We will pass, maybe not by cancer, but maybe by one of the other cancer like challenges in our life. For me, I believe it will be one of those other challenges that will move my life on to the next experiences. The continuation that life brings. Without this worn torn body I drive now. So, I wish no one the pain of their cancer. I do wish and hope for them that they know there is something beyond this body and physical world. Something very beautiful, when we finish our right of passage to it, through the experiences of our present life challenges. God Bless…

I hope you're right about RNA. Right now I'm reading "The Emperor of All Maladies." It's the history of cancer and treatment and it seems we've been stuck on chemo and radiation for almost a century now. It's more refined but it's the same basic treatment.

Good points (and for prostate cancer, add ADT as the third "old school" treatment, dating back to the 1940s I think).

Fortunately, things have changed a lot since your book came out in 2010. Second-gen ARSIs arrived just before the pandemic (Erleada, which I'm on, was approved around 2018), and they've been game changers.

If/when things progress, a common option is Pluvicto: it is still technically radiation, but can target widely-scattered cancer, which traditional external radiation can't. And there are immunotherapies and all kinds of other treatments.

In 2010 our path forward for metastatic prostate cancer was usually ADT ➡️ radiation ➡️ chemo ➡️ "I'm so sorry, there's nothing else we can do."

Now my RO gets so excited that he sounds like a kid in a candy shop talking about all the new treatment options available if my current ADT+ARSI stops working. He also says it could be 10+ years before that happens. More here:
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/treating-prostate-cancer-at-any-stage/

I will add a bit of anecdotal, completely unscientific evidence. My uncle is a retired GP, surgeon, and coroner who still keeps up on the research.

He's always been very no-nonsense: when his parents were diagnosed with cancer in the 1970s and 1980s, he told his sister (my mother) that they would die soon and there was nothing anyone could do, even when the oncologists were still holding out hope.

When my mom called him about my diagnosis (stage 4 oligometastatic PCa to my spine), he told her "Oh, don't worry about that. He'll be fine." Not what either of us expected to hear from Dr. ToughLove, but I'll take it. 🙂

Thanks for the feedback. Didn't realize the book was already 10 years old. Will consider that while reading it.

It's 14 years old!

You're right that 2010 was just yesterday. The stupid calendar must be broken again...

Great article - especially for those not well versed in this disease. It does seem like help is on the way!