Yes, that makes sense. There's no hypocrisy involved -- your needs are your needs. And when you're used to being the guy who's helping, it's very hard suddenly to find yourself as the one needing help.

I had to give up almost all control at first. The cancer damaged my spine so badly that I couldn't even sit up in my hospital bed, so nurses and nursing aids were taking care of my most-personal bodily functions. When I got home, I was a bit more mobile, but my spouse still had to dispose of the bag in the commode chair and empty my urinal bottles for the first couple of months, until I was more comfortable using a walker and we installed a stairlift to the basement bathroom. For a guy who was used to thinking of himself as the strong one everyone else leaned on for support, it was a tough adjustment suddenly being 100% dependent on others.

Also, on a personal note, after radiation and the first couple of years on ADT (which I'm still on), I did gain the ability to have a (dry) orgasm again, though only a partial erection. I haven't tried a vacuum pump yet, but my spouse and I are talking about options now (baby steps).