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Caregiver sundowning

Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: Aug 6 2:23pm | Replies (42)

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@billiekip

Looking for things in odd places. The wild goose chases have ceased to be amusing. Found two shirts rolled up inside of jeans hanging on a hook. I couldn't find my husband's hearing aids or wallet. I finally found his travel kit hidden under the bed with the aids, house key, wallet, a comb, his small family picture book and other treasures; he, of course, didn't do it. Sundowning is real; you can practically set your watch by it. The agitated pacing, the desire to lock the doors, looking in closets for people in the house, the "ancy pants" as I call it starts about 4:30p or 5:00p and lasts until dinner. A teatime with snacks doesn't seem to alleviate the behavior. This was the time of day, I threw my cranky children into a bathtub, so maybe kids have sundowning too.

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Replies to "Looking for things in odd places. The wild goose chases have ceased to be amusing. Found..."

@billiekip-wow. I hear you. We are just getting into this stage of constant searching for lost items…often the hearing aids, and almost daily, the wallet. I was thinking of an AirTag for his wallet, but probably too bulky. Scares me to think of wallet and credit cards, license etc getting permanently lost!
However did you think to look under the bed for those items? (And my husband is totally himself and capable 90% of the time! ) Hugs to you.

I used to struggle finding his things as well but its now gotten easier because he no longer carries a wallet or money or a phone. And he doesn't ask about them either. I disconnected his phone because of his aphasia. It didn't make sense for him to have it if he can't speak to anyone about anything. So his "old" number is now mine. When he sees my phone he tells me he wants one and I tell him its OUR phone and he's okay with that :-). He has stopped asking me about his money and how we wants to go to the bank so that makes things easier as well. Once in awhile he'll ask me for things like his money or i.d. etc, and I just tell him that I have it safe in my wallet and that he doesn't have to worry about it and he has a relieved look on his face and says "ohhh thank you" . Im always reassuring him that him and all of his things are safe and he seems to appreciate it, so I guess I'm lucky in the sense that it's not a battle. I used to struggle with him taking the remote and he'd say he didn't take it and then i would find it in a very random place. Then i tried hiding it on him but he would eventually find it and then it would start all over again. I think he likes all the buttons and colors and that he might remember when he could navigate it, so i went to the thrift store and let him pick out a used one and put his name on it and he carries it everywhere. Seeing the joy on his face that this was HIS, I knew i did something right 🙂 Now whenever he picks up MY remote I tell him that one is mine and show him his with his name on it and things are good again.