Connect
← Return to Fracturing easily - how do you manage everyday life?
Discussion
Fracturing easily - how do you manage everyday life?
Osteoporosis & Bone Health | Last Active: Jul 5 7:10pm | Replies (48)Comment receiving replies
@isabelle7 My husband is very active too and I know if he had the limitations you've mentioned he would have a very hard time.
I have been lifting weights for about 30 years. When I was diagnosed with osteoporosis about 10 years ago I shifted my weight lifting to work on my back and hips. Although I had taken Fosamax for 5 years I had a fracture (sacrum) last year due to pelvic radiation therapy for uterine cancer. I've no idea how that happened and so I'm now seeing an endocrinologist and am on Evenity for 12 months (I have 4 more months to go).
I'm very careful to not bend at the waist unless I do so gently with no weight and only when I'm doing a yoga stretch. Since I've been weightlifting for so many years my legs are strong enough that I remind myself to squat. I keep my back straight, my chest up and squat with just my legs. The squat is what was recommended by my endocrinologist. Sometimes I need help and so I ask my husband if I'm trying to pick up something out of reach or that is too heavy for me.
It's up to your husband, of course, to decide how he wants to live his life. As much as you'd like to help and assist you can only do so much for him. Here is how I look at this: "When you argue with reality, you lose". Your husband's reality has new limitations. He can grouse all he wants but the reality won't change and if he continues to argue with it he'll continue to make himself unhappy, may have more fractures and then he will lose. Hopefully he will figure this out. He doesn't have to like it but that's the way it is. Right?
Replies to "@isabelle7 My husband is very active too and I know if he had the limitations you've..."
Connect
@naturegirl5
Thank you for sharing your experience and for your thoughts. I found them very helpful and read this to my husband. It made him think and realize he's only hurting himself and that I can't do it all for him. So hopefully he'll be more careful going forward. Having said that, I also want him to feel empowered and able to do as much as is safe.
It's really hard on people like you and him who have been so active. I'm sorry you ended up with a fracture after 5 years on Fosamax. We'll be starting him on Forteo for a couple of years in a couple of weeks and then will move to Reclast for several years (the doctor told me treatment would be 5-10 years.)
We are seeing an endocrinologist now and I would say she is the absolute best doctor we've had for the osteoporosis. Very knowledgable and willing to listen to our questions and concerns and is happy to hear what I learn here and from my research on the internet. Which is nice.
You are so right that it is up to my husband how he wants to live and that no matter how much he wants to pretend it's not happening or how angry he gets it's not going to change the fact that his life has changed and he'll have to make adjustments.
Many years ago I was in a bad car accident that left me flat on my back in two braces for 6 weeks. I had no husband or partner then. I was 20 years old. Friends came to help, some not so reliable. I was stuck in a bed with a bedpan and the food and drink they left for me. I had TV but no channel changer. I had a phone in the other room that wasn't accessible to me. So I laid there helpless and it was very frightening. I told him when he thinks this is hard, to remember he's mobile. There are so many things he can still do. The fact he can get out of bed every day and isn't in horrible pain is something to celebrate. I just hope he starts doing the right things because I don't want to see another fracture in a couple weeks when they do another xray. He's got three already.
I also reminded him that when he loses, so do I and I think that made him pause. I told him if things got really bad and he couldn't get out of bed or move that I would not be able to take care of him, that we'd have to have help. He didn't like that at all. I hate to say things like that but it's what gets his attention. Makes me feel bad because all I want is for him to heal and be able to live a happy healthy life. I know - it's all up to him! You are 100% correct.