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Support Group for Those of Us Living With Mild Dementia
Aging Well | Last Active: 9 hours ago | Replies (170)Comment receiving replies
I identify with what you are saying. My husband isn’t too bad yet but he does forget a lot of things that require short term memory. He is driving and still able to run errands etc. I make the appointments and recheck anything that has to be filled out. I also make any other connections needed (repairs, electrical, appliances, etc.,
any social get togethers and the like.
He is crabbier than he has ever been and there are days I just can’t discuss anything with him without him taking everything personally, or making disparaging comments about me. It’s like he has to have the last word no matter what and always puts the blame on someone else.
I could go in and on.
I see from this site it will most likely get more frustrating (for both of us) as time goes on. He is scheduled for a neuropsych evaluation but they can’t see him until Sept. To save myself from overreacting to the situations that come up I have started to see a counselor. It has been a help. I get somewhat less frustrated with him, but still have a ways to go. I recommend anyone dealing with this type if issue in a relationship seek an outlet such as professional counseling.
Replies to "I identify with what you are saying. My husband isn’t too bad yet but he does..."
I agree with you, as I am also seeing an outside counselor to have someone outside of the family and friends to talk too. It’s very helpful and I believe necessary. About 4 years ago my husband began to change. Short temper with me, angry, bad moods. I thought it was our marriage. He started slowly losing things more often, phone, wallet, keys, hat, jacket etc. I was losing my mind and getting angry with him because I didn’t understand what was happening because we had a very good marriage and he never acted this way. Anxiety set it, some depression. He went on meds. Thank God for that!!
Now tat I understand more about MCI I see that anxiety and depression play a big role here. I too, take care of all the appointments, and I write EVERYTHING down or he won’t remember such as a grocery list & he still calls me from the grocery store at least twice. When he leaves the house now, we have a saying: phone, wallet, keys, sunglasses. To make sure he has everything.
Our calendars are sinc’d so that I know exactly what appointments we each have so as not to double book. This is a must!
I write all the bills, I cook, he does the dishes, recycling, garbage. We watch movies together and see our family often to keep the connections going.
He had his neuropsych assessment and he was recommended to go on Aricept, which he refuses to do. Our holistic chiropractor has him on some excellent supplements for the brain and memory.
I joined this group because I needed to have support from other spouses of spouses with MCI to know that I am not alone. It’s scary sometimes. Don’t ya think? 🙃🥹
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I had to put husband in board and care homes. It goes from bad to worse. Do not take anything personally, it’s a sick brain talking, not the person you married sometime ago. I feel for you.