You are right. Things will never get back to the normal it used to be. My husband died 2 years ago this August and I probably think about him daily and talk to his picture. I moved into senior housing where everybody here is a widow. We do activities together like movies, bingo, coloring, exercise class, pizza night, Sat morning coffee, make your own Sundae, etc. You recognize what a funk you are in by writing to this forum. I read something not long after he died that said "It's not fair! I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with him! Then I realized that he spent the rest of his life with me."

I lost my husband a little over 4 years ago. He died unexpectedly.
We had not been together, but 8 years, it was both of ours second marriage but it's still hard to deal with. I am get very lonely and miss him so much. It's the simple things like sitting out on the front porch together and watching the squirrels in the rabbits or having coffee in the morning, are laying in bed at night. Reading the Bible, just having conversation I miss all those things going to east Texas and seeing his mom and brother too. It's so hard, you never get over it. You just learned to go on in spite of it.