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Helping husband understand there is no natural cure
Prostate Cancer | Last Active: May 12 3:21pm | Replies (44)Comment receiving replies
Dr. Frank is who we've been seeing and I've been very impressed with him and Dr Wen, his associate. So it's wonderful to hear from someone who has actually had him for surgery. That's one thing that puzzles me about the hubby, we've had many discussions about the quality of the physicians at Mayo. Both is Urologist and Radiation Oncologist but yet he refuses treatment and won't answer the phone when they're kind enough to call...on a Saturday even...to check on him!!! The side effects aren't that horrendous but they have to be to him and heaven forbid we discuss them.....
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sradeb, great news that you have been meeting with Dr. Frank - What an amazing doctor/surgeon, taking all the time needed to make sure you fully understand your unique situation. I agree with others - At this point, your husband is most likely in denial or terrified of losing certain life attributes. Either way, and unfortunate for all of us, the situation does not change - The cancer is present and a treatment is necessary. Doing nothing only guarantees the cancer will continue to grow and most likely will have significant negative life changing consequences. As with many untreated men, the prostate cancer spreads to the bones, causing significant pain and mobility issues. I remember my uncle going through a quite painful end of life experience with prostate cancer.
Good luck working with your husband on treating the prostate cancer.
Jim
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Psychologists and psychiatrists are prevented by their professional codes of conduct from giving a diagnosis for someone who's not under their personal care.
Since I'm neither of those things, I will go ahead and speculate (as a layperson) that your spouse is still in deep emotional shock and has gotten stuck in the denial stage — talking to doctors or getting treatment would mean admitting to himself that this is real and he has cancer, so he's trying to hold that off and pretend he can keep on going with his pre-cancer life.
Perhaps meeting up for coffee with other local PC patients would help him accept his new situation, but he'd probably resist joining a support group too. Nobody can help him until he's ready to accept help.