Last year, I moved heaven and hell to accomplish a road trip from Michigan to Indiana to Illinois for a visit to my two best friends (probably the last chance to see each other), both of whom have health issues worse than mine; and spending time with my daughter, whom I rarely see. I am the most capable in the lottery of life, though my trusty walker is never far away. My lovely husband, who has dementia and a colostomy, was my traveling companion for most of the time we would be away from home. Are you getting some idea of the complexity of the plan? -- His son drove us to and fro; his daughter took her father for five days so I could solo with my friends. My daughter supplied accommodations for people she barely knew. It was wonderful. It was exhausting. -- Although the schedule was arranged to give my LO time to adjust between each change, he woke every morning and asked me where he was. That reminder was added to the long list of instructions given to his daughter at the handoff. When we returned home, it took him over a month to embrace his routine, which keeps him happy. -- Am I glad that we did it? Yes. I am 86, and opportunity is slipping away. Would I do it again? I don't know. He is 94, and opportunity is slipping away and I became fully aware of his inability to go with the flow. -- As caregivers, the aim is to provide a stable environment; if we accomplish it, routine can mask the extent of the dementia. And we fool ourselves that this routine means progress. -- Would I travel with my LO again? These days, I am completely exhausted by walking through the many-football-field sized Meier where we shop. Talking myself into driving there and back for necessities has become a battle of will over the body. -- Still, I have a folder with information on flights and a hotel with a restaurant for the required stopover to recoup from the first leg of the trip to California, where my daughter has a vacation home. Spending three weeks with her and all that sunshine would be so lovely. If only Scotty could beam us there, I would not hesitate. But I think the details in the travel folder are not based on reality. Still, I have not yet tossed it. -- It strikes me there is little practical information on if, when, and how to travel with someone who has dementia. If you choose to go for an experience, I can suggest your mantra should be Plan, Plan, Plan. Think of every contingency. Make lists. Traveling light might include luggage sent ahead and direct delivery to your destination from providers of incontinent and medical equipment and/or supplies. Use the walker service at airports. Get two walkers if, like me, the caregiver, long treks are beyond you.
If you need to use your own walker, remember that the airlines will stow it along with the carry-on luggage that is not stowed overhead for easy retrieval upon arrival. Make sure it is tagged with your name and phone number. No detail is too small to consider. -- And if you choose not to travel, do not think it is a failure. Be happy there will be nothing left behind. Watch a travel log. -- GloRo