Dear Marilyn, I know how damaging it is to be called stupid as a child. My mother was a cruel mother. I have three brothers and she didn’t like us getting on together…she liked to cause divisions between us. I used to get on well with my eldest brother when we were in our mid teens and she suggested to me one day that we were incestuous. That’s how evil she is. She called us all stupid. I actually believed her so when I got put into the top stream at high school I thought they’d been some mistake! My brothers were all in the bottom stream but they weren’t stupid either. They were amazing at art and carpentry etc but they just weren’t any good at academic subjects. My mother showed no interest in our schooling whatsoever. I once overheard her whispering to my future sister in law that we’d always been thick. When I had my own son he was extremely bright and we both took the official MENSA test and passed. His was 166 and mine was 133 which meant that I just scraped through (I think the lowest is 132 to qualify as a pass). I was 32 at the time and when my mother found out I had become a member of MENSA she said “what did you go and do that for?”. I stopped having any interaction with her when my father died when I was in my early thirties. She’s written me some poison letters over the years until my husband told her no mother should be sending her daughter letters like that. I really don’t know why she had children as she’s not maternal at all. She’s 86 now and I won’t even be going to her funeral when the time comes. It’s amazing that she’s religious (Jehovahs Witness) and when she’s with her religious friends she’s as sweet as can be to them but unfortunately not to her own children. Like you, I’ve always found it hard to mix with people too and only have about three friends who I see once a year for lunch or dinner. People think I’m confident but the reality is a lot of my life has been spent with an inferiority complex. I wish I lived near you as I would love to have you as a friend but alas I think you are in the US and I am in the UK! It’s unfortunate that your son only calls you out of duty but I’ve come to the conclusion that having children is only rewarding for a certain period of time. My son thought I was the best mother in the world but after he reached mid-thirties his visits became more sporadic and now we are lucky to get a call or text once every six months! It’s a horrible feeling to feel sick of living but I think we all feel like that sometimes. I certainly do and I remember occasionally feeling like that every so often from a young age. I’ve got a happy marriage but at times I feel very alone. My husband’s wonderful in some ways but not a very good listening ear so I feel I haven’t got anyone to talk which is the loneliest feeling in the world.